Wednesday, April 09, 2008

Take Time to Memorize Each Other

Monday, April 7th, Sister Elle shines during a visit.
Martijn's lymph therapist, Eric Breuer, plays Frankenstein. Eric is trained in the newly evolving field of lymph therapy. After massage to push the lymph fluid up to the belly area where it can be better absorbed by the body, Eric gently wraps Martijn's leg in special bandages. The swelling and the pain are greatly reduced by this procedure.
At lunchtime, one of Martijn's oldest, dearest friends from his university days, Wijnand van Lieshout, arrives for a day long visit. Martijn wanted to discuss text from Ludwig Binswanger, a Swiss psychiatrist and pioneer in the field of existential psychology with Wijnand, who is an expert on his work. Martijn admires Binswanger's theories on eternal love and wants to use selected text for his memorial service. What a gift for these two 'eternal' friends to have a day to discuss love and friendship in quiet harmony. What a privilege for me to be quietly working on my own in the glow of the environment they create. 

I take to heart what our dear friends, David Fey and Michael Putman, who will arrive to stay with us in 10 days, wrote recently as a comment on this blog: Walk it bravely and in love, holding hands and being in the "now" with each other. Cherish it...and as a lyric from a Josh Groban song ... goes...take the time to memorize each other.

Now is the time for quiet meetings, for thoughtful contemplations about the transcendence of love, for meaningful embraces and acknowledgments of the many friendships and kindnesses shown throughout a lifetime...a too short one. And for me, as I try to do my best to be present, to do my work, to be a caregiver to my beloved, it is truly the time to memorize each other.

2 comments:

Anonymous said...

I just sang that song at the top of my lungs...

"A beautiful and blinding morning,
the world outside begins to breath.

See clouds arising without warning,
I need you here to shelter me.

And I know that only time will tell us how
to carry on without each other...

So keep me awake, to memorize you.
Give us more time to feel this way.
We can't stay like this forever,
but I can have to here with me today..."

Breaks me up every time...but I sing it regularly for you guys. Drives David nuts.

Soon, soon....

Michael

Elizabeth Blackford Scheele said...

I read your sweet words about beds and massages and cakes and friends and hugs and Martijn's story about the cats.... and I feel the great emotions welling up from deep inside of me... from the place of sadness and tenderness and love. I am so grateful that you can make your fingers move across the keyboard and that you are allowing me to see so deeply into your life, your life with all its ups and downs. it is snowing right now. one of those spring time snows that cover the tiny buds of the tulips and crocus. the wind is blowing hard, and the hardy birds that came back are all clinging to the swinging bird feeders trying to gain nourishment for the next few days as the ground is covered in a blanket of snow. they could be hiding , but their survival depends on being right at the center of the storm , getting the energy that will sustain them. I think about you, about how you are in a tremendous storm and how you hold tightly to the nourishment that is Martijn. He is inspirational. He is giving you so much. I love how you two love each other. Libby